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Monday, July 18, 2011

DINOCROC VS. SUPERGATOR

Ok, I admit it: I was looking forward to this one. Seems like all the SYFY channel “biotech gone berserk” movies that had previously been released on DVD had previews for this one on the discs.

Was it worth the wait? Yes. And no. As I also expected, it was very formulaic. This, I’m guessing, is probably one of the legacies of SYFY channel’s former honcho, Bonnie Hammer. I’ve never quite forgiven Hammer for yanking “Mystery Science Theater 3000” off the air. Hopefully she’s now working at Winchell’s Donuts – at the drive-thru window. Graveyard shift. Yelling at bums who pee on the side of the building. Whatever.

Jay Andrews directed this one. Someone needs to tell Jay that if you have one main bad guy in this movie, then said bad guy needs to have a spectacular and ironic death, especially since he’s the one responsible for these lab experiments gone wrong. It’s called “gratifying the audience”. Jay misses the boat here.

David Carradine plays the main corporate villain in this epic. A far cry from his likeable guy image as Kwai Chang Caine in “Kung Fu”.

His role in DINOCROC VS. SUPERGATOR turns out to be one of his last ones. At least he sort of makes it through the picture, so Carradine’s alleged “auto-erotic asphyxiation” kink hadn’t yet killed him. Guess we now can pretty well figure what he was doing back at the hotel during his off-camera hours, eh?

Standard body count for a film of this type, including a couple of bikini-clad beauties. Would have added a humorous flair if the croc had spit out one of the bikini tops and used it to floss with. Probably would have got a ringing endorsement from the American Dental Association.

The one real surprise is that Roger Corman does NOT have a walk-on part here. He does, however, provide commentary, along with Jay Andrews, on a separate track.

I hardly ever listen to commentary tracks on movies of this type; I figure I already have a handle on “what the director meant” in his handling of certain scenes. Really not a lot of subtext to read into when the camera shows the croc munching a girl’s legs off. It’s not Cocteau or Bergman we’re watching here – it’s just another assembly line SYFY channel movie, so I have to say “no thanks” to what the “Peanut Gallery” has to chime in with.

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